Heart Rolling

I have to say... this post is long over due. I should have written it a week ago.

As small children, we all learn certain things very quickly. Like how to say, "NO!" or, "Mine!". And somehow, the majority of us could throw expert temper tantrums without even one lesson! Now I say that lightly, but in reality, it really isn't all that funny. That rebellious heart that we are born with is a product of our sinful and corrupt nature.

Another thing that could fall into the "sinful children's acts of rebellion" is eye rolling. You know, when we don't like something, our eyes seem to want to just roll from one side of our face to the other. This body langauge saying to the recipient of the eye roll, "I don't care what you are saying, and it's stupid. So if you could like, leave me alone that be great." (Or something to that effect.)

Now as we get older, the eye rolling gradually decreases, often because we find it just gives the other person a whole new thing to correct us on. And so we often don't do it. However, the heart issue is STILL there. We may not roll our eyes, but that same old sin is still there.

And so I am finding myself, (this is another of the things that God has shown me in the past week.) heart rolling. Which is only eye rolling on a greater, less visible scale. And because it is less visible, I don't get in trouble for it, because nobody knows. I can think as many disrespectful things as I want and have an extremely disrespectful attitude and not get in trouble for it! Which of course only encourages my sinful heart to do it again. Now of course my heart isn't really "rolling" but if it could... I am ashamed to say it probably would. Wouldn't that be fun to explain to the doctor in the ER, "You see Doc, my heart was being disrespectful to my mother, and it just rolled right over!"

So, all that said, this is something that I am specifically going to be working on in the next couple weeks. So... when you see a little child roll his eyes... You can think of me.

Caroline Ann

Mother, please forgive me for all the times my heart as been disrespectful towards you this week!